I NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING AND BE EVERYTHING

Sorry for the all caps; I have a good reason for using them.

Can you relate to this discernment of madness?

Imagine

At times, I see the world as a giant interconnected maze. We’re all in search of something or trying to free ourselves; there’s an end goal in mind.

However, getting there is a mystery.

That’s where this “I need to know everything” craziness comes about. How do we find our way through the maze? It seems we would need to try every path and test every option to know…

But what if we choose the wrong path? What if we commit ourselves only to find a dead-end? When will we know it’s time to change routes? Should we just follow everyone else?? Oh my gosh, what happens if we never make it out!?

Ponder

I find myself straining these possibilities quite often. (Typically late at night) I can get mangled in contemplation. I question if I’m on the right path — if I’m pursing the right things.

I want answers. We all do.

We see other people who’ve “made it” through the maze all the damn time.

What did they do right? How did they make it to where they are?

Usually, we never find out. The “how to” is never fully explained. With no road maps to follow, the right pursuit remains obscure.

Harsh truth

You’ll never really know if you’re doing the most. You’ll never be certain you’re doing the best for your future. You’ll never be sure you’re putting your energy into the best option at hand.

As the old saying goes, “Only time will tell.”

Relief

If this all sounds incredibly trivial for no apparent reason, that’s because it is. This sort of worrying will do us no good. It’s impossible to realize every possibility and undergo all of life’s lessons. Constant questioning will harm us in the end.

There’s serenity in acceptance. Sometimes you have to say “I don’t know and I don’t care.” That’s okay. You have to let things be and accept who you are.

We’re all part of a bigger picture. We’re all essential to the whole. But, we’re all unique at the same time. Each of us have our own meaning and story.

Live yours.

Bored, uneducated, homeless — em dashes are my specialty. I write what I see, think, and feel. That’s it.

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